Detective Karter: The Case of Blake Lively’s LA Face and Oakland Booty


Last night, Deadpool’s wife, Serena Van der Woodsen (aka Blake Lively) posted a picture to Instagram highlighting her beautiful face and thick booty.


Average people like you and me either don’t follow her on Instagram or would simply scroll past her picture and think “she’s got a pretty nice ass”. Some of us will laugh at the caption “LA face with an Oakland booty” because who doesn’t love Baby got Back?

But some of us have no joy in our lives and will stop at nothing to make sure others feel dead inside as well.

A group of perpetually offended people known as SJWs, the writers of Jezebel, or dumbasses have raised their shrill voices in dissent of not this picture, but it’s caption. Blake references a Sir Mix-A-Lot song and is called “passively racist“.

LMAO

Apparently LA faces=white and Oakland booties=black and it’s not cool to have both. Integration is still looked down upon in 2016. White women are not allowed to have thick butt cheeks. Or maybe they can have some junk in the trunk but just aren’t allowed to comment on it. What the fuck do you progressives want? How do y’all find offense in EVERY FUCKING THING?

“Women should be proud of their curves unless we deem their pride unacceptable”
-SJWs pretty much

Get your bullshit out of here. I hope Blake Lively posts more sexy pictures just to get back at all of you.

FINDINGS:
-Blake Lively has an LA face (TRUE)
-Blake Lively has an Oakland booty (TRUE but probably with less cellulite)
-The offended can fuck off (TRUE)
-Jezebel is shit (TRUE)

CASE CLOSED

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