What REALLY Happens When God Sends Your White Daughter a Black Boyfriend

There was a nifty article published (and then unpublished) to The Gospel Coalition that gave tips on how to cope with your white daughter coming home with a black husband. This niftier guide will help you cope with your white daughter bring home a black boyfriend since most of these relationships don’t make it to marriage. I hope this helps.

chanel preston blacked

1. She’s getting that dick

White women love black men for one reason: they’ve got huge cocks. Look up Lexington Steele and then imagine your baby girl getting railed night after night by that guy. No black man is going to date a white girl unless she’s giving it up. Her boyfriend’s beatin’ it up and there’s nothing you can do but get over it.

donald sterling daughter

2. He Gon’ Let the Crew Hit

Trains are inevitable in these situations, especially if your daughter’s pussy game is tight. Her boyfriend will be in such disbelief at how good he’s getting it that he’ll need his boys to confirm that your daughter is in fact a freak in the sheets. They’ll hit one after another until she’s raw and they’ve had their fun. She’ll love it.

brooke shields marijuana

3. Drugs

Let’s be honest, your daughter is no saint. She’ll obviously start partaking in the devil’s lettuce. Marijuana. Terrible. I hear Obama’s daughter is hooked on the stuff right now. Her black boyfriend will introduce her to this world of drugs and debauchery and there’s no going back.

white woman crying

4. She will be hurt

You raised your daughter to be a strong-willed woman. You taught her not to back down in a war of words if she was in the right. She’s tough. But can she take a punch? She will no doubt pop off at the wrong time and get the back of the hand for it. She’ll come crying to you and you’ll swear you’ll kill that bastard next time you see him knowing damn well you ain’t got a shot at making it out of prison alive. In the end, she’ll come to terms with the fact that her injury was her fault and she’ll go back to her abuser while you look on in dismay. 

She can also be hurt emotionally. Side chicks are also common in these types of relationships. Don’t be surprised if you find out your daughter’s boyfriend is fucking someone else and she has full knowledge of it. She may be sad at first, but then she’ll realize it takes all types of pussy to keep a man satisfied. Besides, where else will she find dick that good?

single mother

5. She will become a single mother

Black men are notorious for not raising their children. Your daughter will get pregnant and she will die. But between the pregnancy and her untimely death, her boyfriend will leave her to raise their child on her own. She’ll have to teach him how to respect women and spent most of her small paycheck on rent for a one-bedroom apartment and cocoa butter. She’ll worry that he’ll grow up just like his father and chances are he will.

Protect your little white daughters. Have a talk with them about the dangers of dating black men. It could save everyone a lot of time and heartache in the end.

Praise me for my brilliance on Twitter: @KallMeKarter

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